20 Best Dark Humor Jokes that i found (If you laugh you're going to hell) By MarioGamer98629

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By @MarioGamer98629
POSTED: 14 Jul 2024 23:24
CATEGORY: Miscellaneous
FEATURED: No (@Draconid_Jo)
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(WARNING: The following jokes are Dark Humor jokes, and most of them talks about sensitive and offensive topics, viewer's discretion is recommended, if you're hypersensitive, please leave this blog)

1. I always do many jokes about unemployed people, sadly, none of them work

2. What does Nemo and your dad have in common? that both can't be found

3. "I'm sorry" and "I apologize" means the same, except if you're in a funeral

4. I love to mock up about orphans, what they're gonna do, tell their parents?

5. An angry mother said to the doctor "MOTHERF*CKER, YOU'RE FAILED OPERATING MY CHILD AND YOU KILLED HIM" so the doctor said to her: "Sorry, it wouldn't happen again"

6. What does Lasagna and Twin Towers have in common? That between floor and floor there's ground meat

7. Why United States and United Kingdom can't play chess? Because US has no towers, and UK has no queen

8. Do you wanna know how i recently seduced an obese woman? It was a piece of cake!

9. Dark humor is like a pair of legs, not everyone has it

10. Today, I asked my phone “Siri, why am I still single?” and it activated the front camera

11. My mom died when we couldn't remember her blood type. As she died, she kept telling us to "be positive," but it's hard without her

12. I was playing Call of Duty in the computer room of my school, but in some moment i had to take off my headphones, but for some reason, is that i could still hearing the gunshot sounds even when i took of the headphones

13. One time, a german guy and a french girl tried to have some sex night, and after a good time, they ended and the german guy said: "That was very pleasant honey, but your polish friend lasted longer with me"

14. i won $3 million on the lottery so i decided to donate a quarter if it to charity, now i have $2,999,999.75

15. The president of the United States one day said to Siri: Hey Siri, please send a message to Ivan, and Siri replied: "Understood, sending a missile to Iran"

16. My grandfather said my generation relies roo much on the latest technology, i called him a hypocrite and unplugged his life support

17. Why is it that you donate one kidney, people love you, but if you donate five kidneys, they call the police?

18. You're not completely useless, you make a fantastic bad example

19. My mom told to me "One man's trash is another man's treasure." Terrible way to learn i'm adopted

20. My grandma has the heart of a Lion and a lifetime ban from the zoo

+1 -0

Kashbanooka
16 Jul 2024 03:53

I made a website for orphans, there's no home page.

MarioGamer98629
16 Jul 2024 03:54
In reply to Kashbanooka

I declare you... LORD COMEDY!

Kashbanooka
16 Jul 2024 03:56
In reply to MarioGamer98629

No I'm not funny.

MarioGamer98629
16 Jul 2024 03:58
In reply to Kashbanooka

Yes, you are

MarioGamer98629
16 Jul 2024 03:58
In reply to Kashbanooka

Yes, you are

Draconid_Jo
16 Jul 2024 03:36

Yeah, I just spoke with the other blogmins about this, and we all agreed that it isn't just the length, the real problem is that these jokes just aren't that funny, and not all of them could even rightly be called “dark humor”.
(Number 14 isn't exactly “dark”, for example.)

Don't get me wrong, a few of these jokes were pretty funny (7, 16, and 20 were my favorites), and if I thought they were funny enough I'd go ahead and feature them anyway, but between not being funny enough and some of them potentially being offensive to people, it's just too hard to justify putting this on the featured blogs page.
(And this obviously isn't about “censoring” a controversial viewpoint or opinion or anything like that, as these are literally just a bunch of jokes.)

MarioGamer98629
16 Jul 2024 03:40
In reply to Draconid_Jo

Ugh... I hate those stupid crystal people, i anyways feel this as a censorship, i hate the stupid dammit sensibility of the people, in this 21st century is hard even to do some spicy jokes, anyways, most of these jokes aren't even mine, its a compilation of many jokes i found on internet...

Draconid_Jo
15 Jul 2024 01:31

These are good jokes and all, and I get that the whole point of dark humor is that it's, well, dark, but there's just not enough here for me to feature, unfortunately.

(Sorry.)

MarioGamer98629
15 Jul 2024 03:09
In reply to Draconid_Jo

Ugh... BITE ME... Wait me, i'm watching a Soccer game, i will later talk to you about this...

20 Best Dark Humor Jokes that i found (If you laugh you're going to hell)

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