One day, in a small village, a hero walked into town. Everyone knew this immediately because his badge said "Hero", and he had a heroic hairdo. He was going to find a Quest. "That's right, mister narrator, I am!" he said. Our hero decided to visit the Armory first, and after a long argument, walked out with a stick labeled "SORD OF JUSTIC AN FITIN", which had cost 10 copper coins. "A bargain! Only 10 coins for a collector's item like this!" The hero, now feeling quite smart and well armed, walked to the Hall of Quests, where he was bestowed an important mission, vital to the kingdom: "Um, quests? We don't really have very many. We do, however, have some angry turnips that seem to hate villagers, could you go take care of those?"

At the field, the Hero began feeling less heroic. "I'm supposed to whack a bunch of moving plants with a glorified twig?" He didn't have time to complain further, because the turnips started leaping from their holes and flying towards him, tiny teeth bared. "Eep! That thirtieth one nearly nibbled my pinkie! Now I'm mad", the hero shouted, brandishing his stick. He charged forwards, tripped over his shoelaces and landed on the turnips, smashing them all. He got up, holding a limp, squashed turnip, and mumbled "Mission accomplished... I won't tell anyone about this." The hero turned, glanced around, then shouted to the narrator, "You better not either!" The narrator laughed. "Too late", he said.

END OF THE PATHETIC FIRST CHAPTER. I'M NOT THE BEST WRITER.