Next time someone says "sticks and stones will break my bones but words will never hurt me" I'm gonna throw the dictionary at them.

Some people can't sleep because they have insomnia. I can't sleep because I have Internet connection.

War does not determine who is right - only who is left.

How is it one careless match can start a forest fire, but it takes a whole box to start a campfire?

Never lie to someone who trusts you. Never trust someone who lies to you.

Taking forever to pick up a phone call because you're dancing to your ring tone.

I need a six month holiday, twice a year.

You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams.

When life puts you in tough situations don't say "WHY ME?", just say "TRY ME".

So my life has reached the point where I've stopped asking "Why me!?" and started asking "Oh, again?"

You should never ruin an apology with an excuse.