If you bothered to read my last blog, you should notice that I visited Lincoln; a scientist. However, in doing so I created a TIME PARADOX! He accidentally invented hypercalculus! This area of mathematics is so complicated, I have no idea. But, this allowed the research in time travel to accelerate. This meant that I went back in time as a younger version of myself who saw my older version.

Time paradoxes are scary. A crocodile might end up as dictator of the world! I had to visit Zelda, a budding tea entrepreneur. This takes place in 19th century England. Coincidentally, this was near the birthplace of Lincoln. In order to prevent the crocodile from taking over the world, I had to stop myself creating a time paradox with another time paradox. This is so paradoxical that time will reset thereby stopping the crocodile from taking over the world. (Science fiction writers intentionally confuse you so that the plot that is otherwise rubbish, is good. Proof: this plot is rubbish but confusing.)

I inserted 10 pence in my time machine and went forward five minutes. It turned out to be a supermarket ride for children. I then realised that I forgot where I parked the time machine. When I finally found it, I saw a parking fine left on the seat. Damned traffic wardens. I then realised that I wouldn't have to pay it anyway (since time will reset itself).

I set course for the 19th century and landed right next to a bin. Across the street I noticed a young merchant selling tea bags. She glanced at me and it turned out she was Zelda. So I rescued her and slew Ganon - No! That's the wrong Zelda! Who did I slay then? Myself! Time paradox!

The universe imploded to a singularity and the big bang occurred.

I have many ancestors who were either mathematicians, scientists or intellectual in general... (same as last blog. History does indeed repeat itself.)