Waffle was born on January 1, 500, on a planet called Waffulz. There, the inhabiants praise the god Waffle God. Except now they praise Waffle King. Whatever.

At age 8, Waffle was crowned leader of his local town, Waffulz463847. He went to every town, and became the leader of every town, eventually becoming king of the planet Waffulz.

Waffle, at age 21, then created a spaceship. This spaceship was run by waffles. Because waffles are cool. Anyway, Waffle used the spaceship to travel to Earth. Then he made a time machine, and aimed to travel to 2020. Instead, he landed in 2009.

Then, he joined SDK. No, not software development kit. Silly. The network your on right now. No, not the wireless network, the social network. There ya go. At SDK, he tried to take over. Instead, he became a blogmin. 'Nuff said.

Waffle was soon interested by Earth games. He learned how to speak English, well more than he already knew, and began writing abput his expiriences. Later, he learned about game reviews. So he wrote about those. His game reviews, however, are public.

I have a record of Waffle's game writings, but they are only avaliable to people with a level 5000 awesomeness level. And only Waffle has that. Woooooooooooooooooow.

When he began putting jokes in his writing, they raised from kinda good to mother awesome.

And that's all the information I could gather before Waffle sent a bunch of Russian slaves to attack me. They acually like serving Waffle, and they are so strong. One knocked out my tooth. Meh, it had a cavity anyway. They did me a favor in that way, I guess.

So that's it. Yeah. I plan on going back into the feild and finding more info about Waffle's true life.

Note: Waffle King did not encourage me to write this article. He just said that BanMan is less awesome than him.