"THE TWERKQUAKE"
[SDK HORROR FEST ENTRY]

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The VMA's were running late this year. So late, in fact, that they had to re-schedule all the way to the 31st of October. "Halloween...", I said to myself as I read the update from my Twitter account. It was only August, meaning that the awards show was several months away, so I decided to save my questions for then and let the whole ordeal go for now. I tossed my iPhone to the side and walked out of the room.

To be honest, I was a little disappointed that the VMA's were delayed. My favorite person was scheduled to perform on the show this time. Who was it, you ask? Why, it is Miley Cyrus, of course! Her overly-forced attemps to be seen as edgy just really turned me on. Lady Gaga was also supposed to have her comeback performance on the show after breaking her hip, and that sounded pretty interesting to me.

I went into my room, closed the door, and jumped into my Miley Cyrus themed bed. I had planned to hibernate for 3 months until the award show, so that's exactly what I would do. I closed my eyes and prepared myself for the longest sleep in my life.

"Oh, the things I do for you, Miley...", I said to myself as I drifted off to the world of dreams. Three months couldn't be THAT long to sleep, could it??

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I jolted out of my three month slumber within seconds time and began to sniff the air quite eagerly.

"Yes..... I can smell it..... It is Halloween!!", I said somewhat creepily. But then a thought crossed my mind. A rather important thought at that.

"Wait..... What time is it?!" I knew my room was pitch black so I knew it was night time, but I couldn't really put my finger on what exact time it was. I quickly glanced at my bedside alarm clock and to my surprise, it was 8:45 P.M.

"8:45?!?!", I yelled, "No!! The VMA's started at 8:00!!" I immediately raced out of my bedroom and into my family room only to turn on the television to see my girl subtly walk out of a giant teddy bear and onto the stage.

"Oh yeah, Miley!! You show 'em, girl!!", I shouted.

To tell you the truth, I was a little disappointed that I missed Lady Gaga's performance. However, not missing Miley Cyrus perform, the reason why I wanted to see the VMA's in the first place, made up for it.

I turned my attention to the television again after quickly realizing that I was missing Miley's performance. The song in which she was to perform had not begun yet and she was practically almost break-dancing on the stage to a virtually unrelated instrumental rap track. She wasn't alone on stage, either. Miley was dancing with her infamous giant teddy bear posse from the music video of the song she happened to be performing. I was somewhat puzzled by this bizarre interlude, but I kept my eyes glued to the screen in front of me as best as I could manage.

Miley Cyrus was dancing wildly and was sticking her tongue out quite often during the performance. This was of course expected by me, a kind and loving Miley-Fanatic. Then, it began. With one last tongue-flick and booty-shake, Miley cued the beginning of her song 'We Can't Stop' to start playing. Almost as soon as the song kicked off, I immediatly found myself singing:

"It's our party we can do what we want / It's our party we can say what we want / It's our party we can love who we want / We can kiss who we want / We can screw who we want..." I sang out proudly. However, what I didn't know was that this was the last bit of fun anyone would have during this ill-fated performance which turned out to be straight from hell. Now that I think about it, the fact that Miley's hit song was cut short would be the least of my worries.

Ms. Miley Cyrus then decided that it would be a good idea to start violently smacking a relatively large woman's ass in front of everyone. After several more tongue-flicks, Miley ceased this action and then pulled off her granny-panties and threw them into the crowd with force. It was at this point that I decided that this was not cool and that there could be some serious devastation due to these once innocent acts.

Just when I thought this freak-show of a performance couldn't get any worse, Robin Thicke came out from backstage to get in on all of this action. Though, he quickly changed his mind when Miley promptly got out her trusty foam finger and proceeded to grope and feel his body up multiple times. Robin looked horrified and who could blame him? If I was being felt up by a six foot tall stripper with a bad haircut, I wouldn't be very happy either. Somehow though, he managed to keep his cool throughout most of the performance. He was such a brave man, which makes the next scene even more unfortunate.

Miley got behind Robin and put her arms around him and his chest. It first appeared to be harmless, but boy were we horribly wrong. Robin began to struggle, but Miley just stuck out her tongue from behind him and licked his neck seductively for everyone to see. It was clear to everyone watching that her grip on his chest was getting tighter, and tighter, and tighter. Robin's struggling became even more vigorous. Then, it happened...

There was blood...

Oh yes, lots of blood...

I tried to look away from the screen, believe me I did, but my curiousity continued to get the best of me. I continued watching this terrifying act that was taking place on the now blood-soaked stage. Robin continued to struggle until Miley's foam finger, which was still tightly wrapped across his chest, began to glow red. Then, with one final jerk from Miley, this horribly bloody mess concluded. Robin's rib cage was ripped apart, showing all of the deeply unfortunate viewers his internal organs.

The crowd screamed in horror as Miley stuck her tongue out another time at the people's disgusted faces. When the horrified reactions did not cease, she responded by leaving the now lifeless Robin Thicke's body to fall and splash violently into the massive puddle of blood beneath them. The song had ended and there was now only silence.

After a long period of only shocked faces, Miley flipped the crowd off with her trusty foam finger and then turned around and bent over, showing everyone her hardly covered ass. From the camera's current angle, we could see one last thing: Her shaking her head wildly with her tongue out. Following this, Miley decided to twerk with so much force that the entire planet shook frantically. The shaking was too much for the Earth's crust to handle. The world then split in two and soon enough, the whole planet was underwater.

Well, as it turns out, Miley's song was truer than we thought. She REALLY couldn't stop. Too bad we didn't have a 'Wrecking Ball' on standby. Heheh...

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And so, in summary, the entire planet's population perished due to Miley Cyrus' highly disturbing buttocks. There were no survivors. This includes both plants and animals. It was a very dark day in our history. The very apocalypse that the Miyans had been predicting for so long now. A day that we can only refer to as...

"THE TWERKQUAKE"!!

True story, bro.

Lul, jk.

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Explanation: Okay, so this is my long awaited SDK Horror Fest Entry. I have been working on it all month, so I'm glad that it is finally done. I sure hope it wasn't too gory for you guys. I knew I was pushing boundaries, but I hope it was acceptable. Thank you all for being patient with me.

Also, yes, I AM taking over the honors of kicking off 2014's SDK Horror Fest next year. Additionally, this was confirmed by this year's coordinator atreyufan1500. Also, thanks for coordinating the hell out of this year's Horror Fest. You made it interesting, and the entire empire of "Us" sincerely thanks you from the bottom of our hearts. To be honest, I never expected this event to go anywhere, but boy... Was I wrong or what?? It's gonna be tough for me to beat you next year, but I shall do my best. Let's just hope that I'm not as stressed out by then because I really want to bring my A-Game next October.

Anyways, if you'll excuse me, I will now go back to doing absolutely nothing on my current blog hiatus, so have a nice couple months!!

Until next time: Lazer OUT!!