Greetings my fellow weeaboos! It's been awhile since I made a piss poor review on a video game, so I thought I could make a quick review on a pretty old but still pretty new game that came out back in late 2017. Yes, I'm talking about Xenoblade Chronicles 2. Since 3DSPaint is pretty inactive and has seen better days, I'm not gonna bother putting too much effort into applying BB code nor will I bother sharing any screenshots of the game because we've all seen what the game looks like. I promise I won't take up too much of your time, so let's begin.

DA STORY

Xenoblade Chronicles 2 takes place in a different universe from the first game where every living organism lives on top of a bigger living organism known as Titans. These titans (like any other living thing) all age and die over time. If these majestic creatures die, so does the people that thrive on them. For some reason, a young underage 15-year-old kid named Rex is able to resonate with one of the most dangerous weapon of the universe known as the Aegis before Jin (generic anime boy antagonist) stabs him through his beating chest. Our boy Rex wakes up in a beautiful place known as Elysium; a place where humanity once lived on. However, the Elysium Rex stands is only a vivid memory from this sexy blade named Pyra. Rex and Pyra's goal is to reach to the real Elysium and meet the architect. And so our journey begins after Rex touches Pyra's boobies and officially becomes the driver of the Aegis.

DA GAMEPLAY

After trying to play through the horrendous main quest 5 times, the game isn't that hard to play. The only reason why some people may find this game complexing is because how the game itself conveys the battle mechanics, but it's actually simple. Like the other Xenoblades, each character is able to initiate different arts. The difference between this game and the other Xenoblades is that every art is mapped to all four buttons on your right joy-con including your special art. You simply watch your character hit people until all your gauges wrapped around the art button is fulfilled and ready to go. Executing these arts also increases your special art. Continuously spamming your arts will level your special art up to 4 times, allowing the player to end your enemies whole career.

One thing players need to take advantage is trying to resonate with as many rare blades as possible and collecting different types of elemental blades. This will allow you to perform epic combos and special chain attacks. It's hard to explain how this method works without screenshots, so you're just gonna have to YouTube it if you're struggling to understand the lame tutorials. Besides, I'm on a deadline here.

Every driver in your party can hold up to three different blades and only Tora can wield artificial blades, and each blade has their own affinity chart. This is crucial since blades can learn to perform moves that can help you outside of battle, and also makes your blade even stronger. You can mod your blades by visiting shops. Additionally you can acquire and equip core chips to your blade for bonus effects.

Drivers are almost the same thing. They have an affinity chart like blades, and you can kind of modify your weapons, but the difference is that you have to spend SP (Special Points) to buff your driver and spend WP (Weapon points) to level your weapons up.

An alternative way to level up your party and level them up pretty fast is doing side quests and sleeping at Inns. Doing this will allow you to increase your party's stats up a couple levels.

Lastly, you can visit quite a lot of countries in the world of Alrest. Make sure you regularly shop and salvage as many materials as possible so you can increase the country's development level. Doing this will make all purchasable items cheaper and add even more resources to purchase. This is key if you plan to take on a bunch of side quests.

DA VERDICT

While I did enjoy playing this game, there's no denying that this game is pure weeb trash. Unlike the previous installments, this game was full-fledge weeaboo garbage that contain many of the clichés anime is known for. The game took forever to pick up in terms of story, and a lot of the tutorials is both TL;DR and fail to explain some things that were crucial to my gameplay experience. I had to research how chain attacks work in order to play through the game properly. After I had all the knowledge underneath my belt, I actually enjoyed just a little. The game picks up once your 30hrs in, which is personally too long in my opinion. I was not huge on the voice acting whether if dubbed English or Japanese, but some characters sounded alright. Most of my time, I find myself cringing a lot because this game is jammed packed with Japanese anime humor that I don't find humorous at all, but humor is subjective, so keep that in mind. If I have to rate this game though, I would give it a solid 7 out of 10. If only the game didn't take very long to pick up and not feel like a Pokémon game with overly exaggerated big boobed girls with its awkward humor, then I would've give it a bigger rating. But besides that cons, the game looked pretty good for a game made by FOURTY PEOPLE!!!! That's right folks. FOURTY FREAKIN PEOPLE!!!! And still, this game was able to look way more stunning than Pokémon Sword & Shield. Keep in mind about 80 or more people are currently working on those two games. Welp. Will you look at the time. It's 2 in the morning and it's waaay past my bed time. I thank you for reading this sorry review, and I'm sorry that you actually read it. Hope you have better things to do.