If you were in Smash Bros., what would your attacks be?

I would have a sabre to use to jab out at foes, and I'd be sporting a fancy Layton top hat.
I'd also be able to throw puzzles at opponents and temporarily confuse them.
Probably turtle tossing would be a highly effective move of mine.
And my final smash would be a giant clock, with hands, that spin around under my control and can throw you off the stage.
:3
What would your moves be?

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Kicks. Just kicks.

The harder the fight, the better the prize...well, hopefully.

farting, screw wario. he stole my mojo.

I loves me some Quesadillas.

My attacks would be thinking, the pen beats the sword.

Do you play the flame game?