1. When the teacher says to “take a seat”, you answer “take it where”.
2. When the teacher calls your name at roll call, you answer “Absent”. . 3.When she calls roll, you answer “yo mama”.
4.When the teacher says something, you say “is that so?”
5.If you so happened to not turn in your homework say, your class pet ate it. . 6.Tell your teacher you’ll turn in your homework, as soon as your parents finish doing it.
7. Tell your teacher you did not turn in your homework because you were watching TV. or because _____ the nerd was absent.
9. While your teacher is grading papers in class, sharpen your pencil. Very loudly.
10.When the teacher says to stop, covertly break the lead and say “but it’s not sharpened”.
11.Never bring a pen or pencil so you always have to borrow one from the teacher.
Return the pencil to the teacher, with the eraser end all chewed and slobbery.
12. Use crayon for important assignments.
13. Lean your chair back so that it is balancing on only two legs. Extra points if you fall over backward.
14.Put wads of chewed gum on the end of your pencil.
15.When the teacher asks a question, raise your hand. If the teacher calls on you, ask if you can go to the bathroom.
16.Ask if you can be excused to go to the bathroom, then take a tour arround the school.
17.Put too many staples on your paper when you staple it. Extra points if you make a good design with them.
18.Write so small on your paper that the teacher can barely read it.
19.Bring brightly colored notebook paper to write on. Examples: neon pink, purple, red, orange, green…and so on.
20.Blurt out the answers to the teachers question. even better if u blurt out the answer before shes done asking the question.
21.When your teacher asks a question, wiggle in your seat and shout “I know, I know!” mind”.
22.Raise your hand. When the teacher calls on you say “I wasn’t paying attention”.
23.When the teacher calls on you, tell her the longest personal story you know.
24.When the teacher says “Pay attention please” reply “how much should I pay?”
25.When the teacher calls on you, talk so softly that the teacher can barely hear you. when she says speak up say something in spanish.
26.When the teacher calls on you say “finally”—Even if you where picked first.
27.Count how many times your teacher says um. At the end of the period, present the grand total at the end of class.
28.Don’t work when the teacher is looking. Work when the teacher is working.
29.Sigh, “This is boring” heavily.
30.Laugh out loud for no reason.
31.Don’t talk to a substitute teacher when the sub says something to you shout stranger danger.
32.Never let your teacher finish a sentence without an interruption.
33.After everything your teacher says say “That’s what you think”.
34. If you have a substitute teacher, ask you and your friends to sit in all different places so that the substitute’s seating chart is all messed up.
35. Keep dropping your pencil.
36.Call your teacher “grandma”.or grandpa
37.Throw lots of spit wads.
38.Fall asleep in class. If the teacher wakes you, say “aww, I was dreaming you were actually nice”. or some other insult of that teacher or class
39.After class, cover every inch of the dry-erase board with dry-erase marker so that the teacher can not write anything on it.
40.Hide other books inside of text books and appear to be reading the text book.
41.After every time the teacher explains something ask “is that going to be on the test?”
42.After every time the teacher explains something say “well, duh”.
43.Make up humorous excuses for being late. example: I was late because I
Forget to have my parents make an excuses for me being late yesterday.
44.Yell “Yessssssssss” after every time you finished something. Anything.
45.Make animal shows on projector.
46.Read your math book when you are supposed to be reading history. If the teacher asks why, say “oh, how did that get there?”
47.Ask a teacher how old she is. When she replies, put your hand over your heart and say “WOW!”
48.Ask the same question the teacher just finished answering 10 minutes ago.
49.Knock a heavy text book off your desk again…and again…and again….and again….
50.Keep finding an excuse to keep walking in front of the projector.
51.Smudge up your paper so that it is hard to read.
52.Ask for help on something. Then say “never mind”. Then ask for help on the same thing 2 minutes later.
53.Make animal bunny ears to the teacher if she/he is infront of the projector.
54.Read out loud during silent reading time.
55.Pretend to fall asleep instead of following instructions. Then say “I don’t get it”.
56.Doodle on your desk. Big, hard to ignore doodles.
57.Write stupid questions on your desk.
58.Put messages in your textbooks.
59.Always write in marker. Bright neon marker colors.
60.While the teacher is talking, roll your eyes. Then yawn and stretch. After that, gaze longingly out the window. Keep looking at the clock every five minutes. Sigh. Very loudly.
61.Whistle very loudly when the teacher is trying to concentrate.
62.Never look up a word in the dictionary. Always ask your teacher.
63.Put staples all over the floor.
64.If you have the guts, start a food fight. ?
65.Come in just after the bell every day.
66.Complain about the food at the school cafeteria.
Walk around class begging for spare change.
67.Chew on your arm until someone notices.
68.Change seats every time the teacher turns his/her back.
69. laugh when the teacher says this and try to get it to come up often
70.after the teacher explains something, laugh really loud and say “Oh, now I get it!”
71.Lick yourself clean like a cat does.
72.After the teacher has explained something, say “Quite right, old bean” in the typical old english style.
73.Sing your questions to the class.
74.When the teacher calls roll, after each name scream “THAT’S MEEEEE!!! Oh, no, sorry.”
75.Address the teacher as “your honour”.
76.Sit in the front, sniff suspiciously, and ask the teacher if he’s been drinking.
77.Ask for an extra copy of each handout, for your invisible friend sitting next to you.
78.Claim that you wrote the class textbook.
79.Stand to ask questions. Bow deeply before taking your seat after the teacher answers.
80.Laugh loudly at everything the teacher says. Be sure to snort and make weird noises while you laugh.
81.When the teacher turns their back to the class, scream and bang desks, then when they turn around act normal and get on with your work.
82.Get everyone in the class to start humming softly, and gradually hum louder
83.At a completely random time, put up your hand to ask a question. When the teacher picks you, ask a question about a different subject and pretend you thought it was that class.
84.Put your hand up, and when the teacher acknowledges you, just say “I’m pointing at the ceiling”.
85.When a substitute introduces himself as a substitute, have you and your friends all yell “FRESH MEAT!!!!” at the same time.
86.Raise your hand as if to ask a question, then just say ‘buh buh bah buh buh buh?’ or similar nonsense. Then act like the teacher should get it.
87.Say you’re invisible and when people say you’re not, start crying.
88.Superglue a coin to the ground and watch people try to pick it up.
89.While the teacher is writing, hide the board rubber. When he/she goes to get somebody (like the principal), replace it in the same place & make him/her look insane.
90.Tell your teacher that you don’t do homework because it’s against your religion.
91.Wear X-Ray Specs. Every few minutes, ask the teacher to focus the overhead projector.
92. Sit in the front row and spend the class filing your teeth into sharp points.
93. Sit in the front and color in your textbook.
94. When the teachers calls your name in roll, respond "that's my name, don't wear it out!"
95. Introduce yourself to the class as the "master of the pan flute".
96.Wear earmuffs. Every few minutes, ask the teacher to speak louder.
97. Watch the teacher through binoculars.
98. Wink at the professor every few minutes.
99. In the middle of lecture, ask your professor whether he believes in ghosts.
100.Listen to what the teacher says, and pick out a word that is said often, like “the”. Each time the word is said, run a circle around your desk laughing and clapping loudly.
101.Whenever the teacher speaks to you, act like you’re terrified of him/her and go run & hide in the corner or under your desk.
102.Go up to the teacher but face the empty space next to him/her and ask if you can go to the office to get your medicine for hallucinations.
103.As soon as the bell rings to start class, crawl under your desk and huddle with yourself and grab onto your chair and scream.
104.Start clapping, but keep a steady beat. When other people start clapping, start singing opera..
105.Draw a smiley face on a piece of paper, and talk to it.
106.Refuse to do any work until the whole class has put on rubber gloves for fear of lead poisioning.
107.In class when the teacher is talking, pretend you’re not paying attention and if she picks you to anwser, say “So the Rhino did go to the beach with the Elephant”.
108.While taking a test, get up about halfway through and point at the teacher or someone random and scream “You ruined christmas” and then storm out of the room, slamming the door on your way out. THE GRINCH
109.Repeat everything the teacher says right after him/her to confirm that you agree.
110.When the teacher turns his/her attention to you and calls you to answer the question, act as if you’re an undercover agent and refuse to give information.
111.When forced to type up an essay or project, put the whole thing in one of those whacky fonts (the ones that are all symbols and the sort) then act confused when your teacher can’t understand it.