Oh look, I missed a blog last week. Oh well. It turns out that my doctor said I would explode if I wrote a blog last week. And he just told me tomorrow.

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Oh hey there. As some of you may or may not of heard, I review snacks. I do this because everyone uses snacks, and should be informed of them before they are consumed. I am saving you time and money. If you would like, you can mail me the money you would have spent, as a small token of appreciation for my help. Now, this week I shall do....Goldfish. Goldfish are pretty much the bulk of my young days, as I remember nothing more than nibbling on those cheddar pieces of aquatic decoration. For those of you who do not know, Goldfish are just just fish crackers that are flavored. They come in different flavors, and their most popular is cheddar. And how odd, for I will be reviewing that very flavor!

It's 7:00PM. I'm prowling the store, on the search for a snack, and eye-balling every cute teenager girl that I see. I come to a big row. They are all filled with Goldfish bags. Suddenly, my short life flashes before my eyes. It's filled with happiness, and rejoice. I grab the cheddar flavor, tip the hot bagging lady, and run home.

It just so happens I have a project to do when i arrive home. For my Robotics class, I must a construct a robot using parts from Hulo. The robot has to pick up cups and move them around anywhere I want it. And for some stupid reason, I have to build and program it myself from scratch, which is a royal pain in the ass. I start constructing it, following the instruction booklet which closely resembles K'nex. My stomach grumbles as I tighten a screw. I didn't have the time or patience to build a Roast Beef Sub, so I grabbed the newly bought bag of Goldfish.

I open the bag with my bear hands. And yes, this time I actually did have real life bear hands on. The smell was purely cheese. It was so good, it was almost intoxicating. I took one fish. it had a little smile on it. It looked as if it was mocking me. I eat it. I quickly chew and swallow. There was a nicely balanced flavor differential between cheddar cheese and just plain cracker and salt. I took two more and popped them in my mouth. I grabbed 10 more. Than a handful. God damn it. It was then I realized I got sucked in. I couldn't stop. Putting down my barely built robot, I had the bag in my hands, taking handful after handful, cramming them all into my mouth. Crumb after crumb rolled down my jacket, and Into the waiting mouth of my cute dog. Putting the empty bag on the table, my mouth was over-flowing with Goldfish, and my jacket and pants looked like the surface of the carpet under my bed. I felt positively sexy.

Rating Time! Now, I rate snacks on a scale from 0-10. I liked the Goldfish. But, alas, it 'twas addicting. I couldn't stop. I wish they came with a little speaker, that yelled at me to stop. Maybe they should make the cracker bigger. I literally couldn't get enough, and that is what caused me to eat the whole package in a matter of seconds. I rate this snack a...7.28. That is all.
This concludes another dazzling blog by yours truly. Rate, comment, and suggest a snack. Have a nice...life.
-Seth